At The Very First Instance

At the very first instance, it’s actually quite rare… for people to love you for who you see yourself to be -whether you think you have a kind heart, a generous soul, a free spirit…

At the very first instance, people “fall in love” with  or “start loving” someone…because they see something in that other person that resonates within them – and there’s nothing wrong, or bad, or inherently disappointing about that.

It’s just…not enough. Not yet.

At the very first instance, people will love you because of who they are around you, how they feel by being with you, how you “make” them feel.

At the very first instance, knowing this, even accepting it for what it is, actually feels quite sad for me.

Because we all want to be seen – the way we see ourselves, the way we know ourselves, the way we live our personal truths so to speak.

I know I do. I know I want to be loved not just as a reflection of someone else, or for what I have in common with someone, that helps them feel that all too familiar comfortable feeling that somehow translates to love, and not only for  how I “make” other people feel – ah, there’s a whole blog post topic right there …”how people make other people feel“, but I don’t want to go off tangent so I won’t even talk about that here.

This I’ll say though, while at the very first instance, I may be ok, even feel thrilled with all of the above…after some time, I would want to know I am loved … for just being me.

And that means, to be loved for simply being a whole different person.

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